I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.

Speak only if it improves upon the silence.

Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.

There are many causes I would die for. There is not a single cause I would kill for.

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.

History does not repeat itself, but it rhymes.

If you love life, don't waste time, for time is what life is made up of.

Death may be the greatest of all human blessings.

By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.