I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.

Speak only if it improves upon the silence.

He who is not contented with what he has, would not be contented with what he would like to have.

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.

I want to stay as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all kinds of things you can't see from the center.

We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be.

The only difference between Bush and Hitler is that Hitler was elected. About George W. Bush

Being a Humanist means trying to behave decently without expectation of rewards or punishment after you are dead.

There is nothing more exhilarating than to be shot at without result.

Shrapnel was invented by an Englishman of the same name. Don't you wish you could have something named after you?

I wonder how it is with you, Harold? If I don't have a woman for three days, I get terrible headaches. Conversation with Harold Macmillan, in Bermuda (1961)

Be not false about the past.

The average Hollywood film star's ambition is to be admired by an American, courted by an Italian, married to an Englishman and have a French boyfriend.

Someone asked someone who was about my age: "How are you?" The answer was, "Fine. If you don't ask for details."