Children are naïve -- they trust everyone. School is bad enough, but, if you put a child anywhere in the vicinity of a church, you're asking for trouble.

My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as far away from a church as you can.

The first thing you have to do if you want to raise nice kids, is you have to talk to them like they are people instead of talking to them like they're property. Frank Zappa on Howard Stern, 1987

People make a lot of fuss about my kids having such supposedly 'strange names'. But the fact is that no matter what first names I might have given them, it is the last name that is going to get them in trouble.

I have four children, and I want them to grow up in a country with a WORKING first amendment.